Hot Flashes & Frost Bite
by SaintlyScarlet
Summary: Bella leaves her life as a ballet prodigy behind 2 return 2 her broken family thats struggling to cope w/ a divorce, but her secret demons won't stay buried 4 long as the unavoidable Edward Cullen is determind 2 make her life miserable. Full Summary ch1.
1. Homecoming

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta's Brooke and Donna (girlwhoreads) for all their hard work on this story. Without you two, my story would be mediocre at best!

**Summary:**

Bella Swan leaves her life as a ballet prodigy in England behind to return to her father and sister in America, who are struggling to cope with a family divorce. Hiding her own demons, she puts her personal wants and needs aside for her family in their moment of need. But external forces are working against her; Translation: her secret demon's won't stay buried for long and the unavoidable Edward Cullen is bound to make her life miserable throughout her ordeal. Can she keep her own problems wrapped up long enough to keep her family entact? Or will this new life force her to face her own problems head on?

**Enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 1**

"Um, miss, we're here," the cab driver said turning around in his seat. I snapped out of my daze and fumbled for my wallet, jet lag well set in. I was wondering if I was making the right decision in coming back to America, but deciding it was too late to turn back now.

"Right, ummmm... here."I tossed him $80 "Keep the change."

I got out and stood there, vaguely aware as he set my luggage next to me and drove off. I stared at the two-story stone washed brick house in front of me, the white shutters well aged and smoke rising from the chimney. It was welcoming and that scared me.

After the longest five minutes of my life I took a breath in, choking on the unexpected cold air - will have to remind myself not to do that again - I grabbed my bags and headed for the front door.

I carefully made my way up the icy drive way, as I contemplated how I got to this point in my life. A place where my own desires no longer mattered above the needs of my family, whether they liked to admit those needs or not.

Since I was 12 my family had taken a back seat to my career: I left the country to attend ballet school in Russia, and then went on to graduate and join one of the most prestigious companies in the world. Things change, I guess...

Perhaps it was because nothing like this had ever happened before (think white picket fence or pleasantville) or perhaps I just wasn't the typical self-absorbed 22 year old. I'd like to think the incident that happened two and half years ago had aged me beyond my years, but then again my grandmother repeatedly told me when I was barely a teen that I acted like a middle aged woman.

In the past, Jasmine or Dad would get over disappointments and move on after a few days; so, I never worried much. I'd give them a 24 (for my sister) to 72 ( for my dad) hour period and then used a calling card to call home and see how things were. But this... icy drive way, this sunless town... this new home wasn't a disappointment, it was life altering proof of internal disaster to me and me alone. No one else would understand; because to the outside world, we were just another family going through a divorce.

It had come to be much more than a disappointment. Mom had up and left us in June of this year for her "bright and young" intern after telling Dad of all his failures in life. We had no clue where she was. All we knew was she walked in and said, "I don't want you anymore, I want a divorce," and never looked back.

Not only did she not want my father , she clearly didn't want my sister and me staked claim to the house and the Range Rover and told him "everything else is yours". My father was devastated. And my sister, only 17, with raging hormones didn't know how to put her own feelings aside to care for my father. I was the older, "mature" one... I would have to do the damage control. Meaning I had to leave my life in England behind.

After getting my luggage up the front steps, I claimed defeat and decided they could sit there on the front porch for a while until I was ready to tackle the next set of stairs up to my 'new' room. The front door was surprisingly unlocked and as I closed the door behind me, I stood there to take in the surroundings.

My dad had moved himself and my sister back to his hometown three weeks after I'd left for England in August. After living in a city of 100,000+, Forks, a town of about 3,000 people, was bound to leave my little sister a bit stir crazy, but my father found solace here.

After Grans died, he inherited the house. Mom had begged him to sell it, but he had refused. Now I was guessing he was glad he hadn't listened to her. I wanted to hate my mother for her decision, but she'd always been irrational and flighty and my father had married her knowing that.

The foyer was bare accept for a long wood table with a mirror hanging over it and a crystal vase of flowers on it, when I'd come here as a child Grandma always had fresh flowers in the foyer. She said it was the first thing people saw, so it made a good impression on the care of the home and those who lived there. I tried to ignore the fact that the flowers were wilted and dried out.

I looked at myself in the mirror: my long brown curls were now in tangles and the circles under my brown eyes complimented the mascara smudges. I looked a mess. As I took a step, the wood creeked so I looked down and followed the cherry wood floor panels through the door in front of me that led to the kitchen. I could hear wood crackle in the fireplace in the back living room that's connected to the kitchen. When I rounded the corner my dad was sitting at the kitchen table with his morning paper in hand and a coffee in front of him. He had bags under is eyes and his shirt was wrinkled I could tell he was trying to concentrate really hard on reading.

"Dad?" I said and he jumped, dropping his paper and knocking coffee onto it.

"Bella?" he was staring at me as if he was seeing a ghost. "What on earth are you doing here? We... we weren't expecting you for a visit until after Christmas." He tried not to let the smile spread across his face, but I knew it was there as he got up to hug me.

"I... I decided it was time to come home," I said hesitantly and pulled away to gauge his reaction.

"What do you mean?" he said staring at me confused.

"I missed you and Jasmine too much. It seems the older I get the more of a homebody I become." I forced a grin and there was a long pause. He didn't buy it. I rolled my eyes, "I left the ballet company Dad." I paused again to take in the look on his face and make sure he wasn't having a heart attack, his face showed a mix of shock and pain, "You and Jasmine need me right now, this is where I need to be and I can't be there knowing I should be here." I was going to have to work on this sudden, constant defeat thing. It must be the jet lag.

He was baffled. "Isabella, I'm fine. Your sister is fine."

"Dad, you just moved her across the United States. I'm sure she is fine - for you - but that can't be fun when your family is falling apart and you have no friends." I said in Jasmine's defense, "Besides... look at you... why aren't you at work? Not to mention, when have you ever worn a wrinkled shirt? Lets face it; being back in Forks helps a little, but you are..." I caught a glimpse of the bread on the counter; it was covered in green mold. I picked it up, trying not to make a face, "not... okay." I looked at him and now he was the one staring at me in defeat.

"I'm trying, Bells, but I don't want you to give up on everything you've worked so hard for just because... " He sighed in exasperation "I can't cook and your sister has to go to a new school for the first time in her life."

"I'm not..." I paused again trying to decide how to phrase things and decided to throw myself in for a good measure."I need this too... I will stay for a little while, see how things go, When you two are on your feet and I'm feeling confident I'm ready to dance again, I'll decide what to do from there. Seattle has a great ballet company, you know? And I won't be far from home... so maybe I'll look into that. However, you and Jas are more important than my dreams, Dad. You're all I've got," I said, tossing the bread in the trash. He conceded that was true as he finished dabbing his paper dry from the coffee spill.

"Well, I guess... I mean, that means we need to talk about getting you enrolled in school near here then... for the time being... that is." He looked up and his eyes roamed the room and the view of the hallway. "Where are you bags?"

"Front porch. I had to battle them all the way to the front door. What's with the snow? I thought it rained here most of the time." I looked in the fridge to make a mental note of food I'd need to pick up later on. The sight and cleanliness of the mostly unused fridge was pathetic.

"Cold front. I'll help you get them inside. How are your online classes going?" He asked starting for the door. I was now in my second year of University for an Art History degree with a minor in French and Italian studies. It was particularly hard to take a full load of classes and dance 40 hours a week. So, I had gone part time up until this semester. What possessed me to take a full load when my personal life was falling apart was beyond my comprehension.

"Good, I guess. I'm passing." I continued to check the kitchen for anymore overgrown fungus that my obviously oblivious family might accidentally digest.

"Bella..."

I chuckled. "Dad, I'm just struggling with one class, the others are fine. I'll work on it."

He stuck his head back through the kitchen door to meet my eyes once more and when I saw the look on his face I realize exact how terrified he truly was of everyone in his life just up and leaving him like my mother had.

"Bella, if... if you decide to stay, maybe we should go to Seattle one day to check out the university for next semester. I'll talk to a friend, see if I can get some strings pulled." He fidgeted. "But only if you decided to stay."

I stared at him in shock. He thought I'd want to leave him. I silently cursed my mother to the bottom of Hades, eternally. Now, I seemed to be able to channel the right kind of anger towards her.

"Wait. Dad," I sighed, peering at him from behind a cabinet door (I was going to have to pick up cooking utensils, too). "If I'm going to live here... I'm going to need a car; I'm an adult and I can't depend on you to take me everywhere." I had hoped my statement made it clear I didn't plan on going anywhere for the time being.

"Oh... right. I guess we do need to look into that," he said, starting out the door again with a smile on his face.

Dad helped me get my bags inside and up to my room. I tried to remind myself of what rooms were what because it had been years since I'd been in this house. I remembered upstairs there was a master bedroom and three others, with a shared bathroom in the hall. Jasmine and I would have to share a bathroom, which wasn't that bad; at least it wasn't a bedroom. When he opened the door to what I assumed was my new room, I was flabbergasted.

"Jasmine said it would help her if it seemed like you were here all the time," he tried to explain, "So I stayed up one night and put your bed set together and bought you new linen's the next day."

I wandered into the room and my bags fell to the floor.

"Wow, Dad." I looked at my bed, noting that it now had throw pillows. "Thanks."

It was the same bed set I'd had in Newport News, a Crackle teal painted wood bed frame, queen size, with two matching side tables, a tall dresser and a pink crackled desk. I'd gotten it for my 12th birthday right before I'd moved away to attend ballet school in Russia.

The new cream comforter matched the walls and the cream curtains hanging from the window, and the pastel throw pillows were a perfect contrast against the colors of the bed set.

After an awkward silence, he left me to get ready and I pondered over what it must have been like to see my dad wander into a store like Crate & Barrel and pick out throw pillows, Then I laughed like I hadn't laughed in months.

After I'd freshened up, Dad dropped me off at Forks High School and gave me Jasmine's spare car key so I could use her car to run errands. Once I was done, I decided to go back by the school to try to catch her in between classes so she didn't think someone had jacked her car.

I stopped at a coffee shop to get a venti tea to feed my caffeine addiction and calm my nerves. It gave me prep time; I knew I couldn't conceal my disappointment of being home as easily around her. She'd see right through my facade if I wasn't careful. After all, I'd just walked away from my dream company and possibly just given up the chance at numerous principal role offers next spring. It was all starting to sink in, what my actions would cost me personally and professionally, but this wasn't about me. As much as it hurt to be forced to walk away from something I loved so much, I love my family more and I refused to be selfish in a time when I needed to be selfless. Jasmine looked up to me, so I needed to put on a brave face for my sometimes irrational, all the time emotional little sister.

When I finally got to the school, I parked in visitor parking. I spotted Jas talking with two boys by the breezeway. She looked tired, but still cute in her skinny jeans and purple sweater with her long ash blonde hair and blue eyes. A stark contrast to my dark brown hair and chocolate eyes. Then again, that explained us in so many ways. Most noticeably, besides physical features, my sister had always been the clown and outgoing and I had always been the serious one and slightly more reserved. She hadn't really had any ambition to be a dancer (quitting after 4 years). Over the past three years she'd decided she wanted to be a marine biologist and, being in high school, she'd planned her courses around that. Dad had been happy she'd found something to focus on. Mom just worried about what she wore, when her next hair cut was and what guy she liked. I guess we should have seen the signs. I got out of the car and headed in their direction.

"Belllla?" came a shriek when I was halfway across what I assumed would be grass in the summer time. I smiled and waved. She ran at me and practically knocked me over in a bear hug meant for a two ton elephant. (I'd love to see a bear hug an elephant, boy would that be a sight).

"Hey Jas," I laughed.

"What are you doing here?" She was in shock. I looked at her and shook my head, while trying to break free from her grasp.

"Do you not remember leaving me a long winded voicemail about Dad being depressed and you hating Forks?" I asked quizzically.

"Yeah, but you've never ran home when I've left you dramatic messages before." She looked concerned so I smiled.

"Well this is a little different situation, Jasmine," I said, walking towards a bench to get off the ice-snow mix; she followed at my side. "I just wanted to stop by and let you know I had your car so you didn't think it was stolen by the Sasquatch," I joked.

"So how long are you staying?" The concern growing in her voice as some sort of realization started to set in.

I leaned against the side of the worn wood. "Until things are better." I crossed my arms and avoided looking at my feet, opting instead to focus on her earrings.

"But what about ballet?" I could hear the panic in her voice as she took a step towards me. It had begun to snow lightly. To my left I could see two figures staring our way but I didn't turn to look.

"Look... Jasmine, I'm a good dancer, yes, and I can get into any company I want, but I only have one family and right now what they need is more important than my need to dance." I looked straight at her and kept my mask up to the last strand of hair on my head. She gasped.

"Bella, you can't do this. That's your life; you'll be miserable here. I never meant for you to leave England. I just thought you'd call and talk to Dad and pep him up a little... You - " I waved her off.

"Stop."

"But - "

"No." I stopped her again as the school bell rang out. "Jasmine, I need to be here. I WANT to be here. My mom is gone, too, you know. We need to do this together. That's all there is to it. Discussion closed. Now go to class before you're late." Her eyes brimmed over with tears as she looked at me with a guilty face. I gave her a small smile and pulled her in for a hug, "It's going to be ok, Jas I'm not giving it up forever. I didn't close the doors on that part of my life, I just... have to visit some other areas for a little while. I promise, I will go back, full force, when I know you and Dad are okay and when I know I'm okay to leave you two."

"I'm so sorry, Bella," she said, not letting me go.

"Don't be, I'm not," I whispered so my voice didn't crack. I looked up to meet eyes with the now three people standing at the end of the building, that's when I realized who they were. Dr. Carlisle Cullen was looking over his shoulder as a very shocked looking Alice and Edward Cullen peered around him. I immediately looked away. I backed away from Jasmine as I felt tears begin to form.

"Get to class, I'll be here when you get out," I said and turned immediately to head back towards the car as the tears finally started to break the brim and flow down my face.


	2. Deja Vu

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**Author's note:** Sorry, I forgot to post that the first chapter was from Bella's POV. So this one is from Edward's POV. Every chapter will not back track, but hopefully move forward - it's just important to the story line to show the 'first' encounter from each persons prospective - for reason such as character introduction, back story, etc. So please bare with me :). Thanks.

**Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta's Brooke and Donna (Girl Who Reads) for all their hard work on this story. Without you two, my story would be mediocre at best!

I hope you like it!

* * *

**Chapter 2**

Edward POV

"Hey kids, what are you doing home?" Carlisle called out from his chair in the living area as I walked through the door. He was reading a paper and I was half shocked to see him there, as he almost never had time off these days.

I just stood there gaping at the sight of him actually sitting down relaxing in his own house when Alice nudged me.

Alice and I had skipped our afternoon classes and decided to come home early for the weekend. I'd desperately wanted to get away from the city because studying for finals had me a little on edge. I was a pretty smart guy and had never had to try hard for A's, it came natural, but this semester had gotten to me for some reason. Then again, six years in school will most likely do that to a person and the stress of my USMLE's (United States Medical Licensing Examination) next semester wasn't helping.

"Uh... um, we skipped class today," I said finally. No need to lie, he'd figure it out anyways. I didn't understand why, as a 24 year old, I was intimidated of telling my father I skipped school. I unbuttoned my peacoat, the rush of heat from the room hitting my chest as I opened it.

Carlisle cocked an eyebrow at Alice and me after a moment and we just looked at each other and laughed.

"Well, I think you guys have perfect timing," Esme said walking through the door from the kitchen, a coffee in hand, which she sat on the side table by my father. Her hair looked freshly done and I noticed she was wearing dark jeans and a long sleeve white polo.

"What's the catch?" I smirked. I took my peacoat off, laying it over the piano bench before walking forward into the living area.

"I was going to have lunch with the girls shortly. You two should spend some time with your father and go do something fun." She shrugged, leaning on the back of Carlisle's chair.

"Fun? In this town? It's freezing and snow packed... it's not like we can go hit the ball around the field a couple times, Mom," Alice chimed in, waltzing over to plop down in the chair across from dad.

I swear that girl was a ballet dancer in one of her past lives. Alice was so petite, especially in contrast to Emmett and myself. I'd venture a guess to think that if someone vaguely knew our family, they would guess her to be the adopted child before they thought it was me. At least until they saw Esme and the distinct color and shape of their eyes.

Esme walked over and put her hand on my shoulder. "You guys should really do something with you father today. Think about it." she whispered and patted me on the back, "Good to see you home, son." She smiled at me once more, before turning to head up the stairs.

It had been a while since I'd come home. During the semester I tend to stay in Seattle, especially now that I was in med school. Seeing as I didn't know where I'd be heading in a year and half for a residency though, I had decided I needed to start taking more advantage of family time. Translation: I was attempting a futile effort to spend more time in forks because I knew it would make Esme happy.

There was no doubt that as quickly as this semester was going, a year and a half would be here in no time. Once I got into residency it could be three years before I actually got my license to practice. Regardless, I knew my decision to go into the medical field made both my parents proud. I also knew that the idea of putting even more miles between us considering how tight knit of a family we were was silently taking it's toll on them and my distance the past two years wasn't helping.

"Why don't we go to lunch, Dad?" I said after a moment, slipping my hands in my pockets and cocking an eyebrow at him.

He and Alice both snapped their heads in my direction, before mirroring a slow smile.

"I'll go get changed then," Alice sung jumping up and practically sprinting for the stairs.

Dad and I laughed as I sat down in the chair where Alice had been sitting and turned on the TV.

"How's school going, son?" He asked after a moment.

I just nodded, "It's going," I sighed. "I'll be glad when this semester is over." I flipped the channel to BBC news and ran an exasperated hand through my hair trying to physically remove the anxiety from my mind.

Carlisle chuckled, "You do realize it's only going to get harder. Especially with your chosen field?" I looked over to find him smiling, eyes still on his paper.

"I know, what was I thinking, right?" I joked dryly.

He laughed. "Have you narrowed down your decision?"

"I'm thinking an orthopedic or neurological surgeon."

Carlisle looked up from his paper a little surprised. He knew I had wanted to follow in his footsteps, almost like going into a family business, but when I said it aloud the biggest smile graced his lips oozing pride.

I laughed and shook my head. "Anyways, how are things going at the hospital here?"

"Good actually," he said, looking back at his paper. Dad had moved us all to Forks when we were teenagers. He and Esme had craved a quieter life after the one we'd had in Chicago and Forks, despite the dreary lack of sun, had appeased them thus far.

"Okay, are we ready to go?" Alice asked, skipping back into the room successfully managing to look like a full out snow bunny.

"Jesus, Alice, are we going skiing or are we going to lunch?" I smirked.

She rolled her eyes. Carlisle and I both stood as his phone rang.

Alice and I headed for the door as he spoke, "Dr. Cullen speaking."

I sighed as I instantly had a feeling our lunch plans had just gotten squashed. I turned to face him, making sure my shirt was tucked into my trousers nicely and picked up my peacoat to put it back on. Alice stopped in front of me and turned on her heel to face him, putting her hands on her hips. She wasn't going to let him get out of this and I could tell when they met eyes, Carlisle knew that.

"Right, well I'm actually heading by that way now to go to lunch with my kids. I could stop by and check in on her if she's refusing to go to the hospital." He nodded at Alice and she spun back around to face me with a look of victory on her face before skipping out the front door. I just ran my hand through my hair again and laughed lightly, following her out.

"You kids have fun," Esme called out the door.

"You, too, Mom," Alice said before hoping in the back seat of the Mercedes. I looked up to see Esme wave before she disappeared back through the door, then slid in the front seat and closed my door.

After what seemed like forever, Carlisle appeared with his medical bag in tow. Alice groaned. He plopped it in the seat beside her before climbing into the driver seat.

"We need to run by the school. Ms. Cope collapsed and she's refusing to go to the hospital." He shook his head pausing, "Her husband has been voicing concerns to her all week regarding dizzy spells apparently and she's not heeding his advice to seek medical attention." He sighed while turning the car to head down the driveway.

"So, You're just going to force her?" I asked, furrowing my eyebrow.

"Maybe she'd be better off if she lost some weight," Alice chimed in. I snickered at the thought.

"No, Edward, this isn't a call as a doctor, this is a call as a friend. I'm going to go check her vitals to see if I think she's okay to continue working for today or if she should be taken home. If I think she needs to seek medical attention, hopefully she'll heed my advice over everyone else. Seeing as I am a doctor," He said, cocking an eyebrow.

"And Alice... you think everyone needs a healthier life style," He points out.

"How long is this going to take?" she whined, slightly irritated.

"Don't worry Alice, after this we have all day!" Carlisle said, chuckling. "Who knew you wanted to spend time with your old man so badly?" We all laughed.

"Well, it is a rarity." She conceded raising her eyebrows and then added. "Anyway, I think the man that feeds my shopping addiction needs some praise every now and then."

"Boy, do I feel bad for Jasper," Carlisle said looking at me. I chuckled.

"Yeah, the boy doesn't realize what he's getting himself into."

"Hey!" She said, popping me on the back of the head.

Before long we pulled into the school parking lot and I suddenly realized where I'd gotten my driving habits from. I guess it helped to practically drive a tank though... I'd have to look into that. I shook my head to myself as I got out of the car.

Alice and I strode up to the school with Carlisle before pausing to wait outside by a couple of benches. It had been a long while since I'd been to this school and, looking around, it eerily seemed exactly the same. Emmett had graduated the year before Alice and me. He was now a corporate business man; while Alice had taken a few years off to study at a fashion warehouse in Paris and was now a junior at UW Seattle. So it had been around six years since we'd stepped foot at Forks high school.

"Wow, brings back memories, doesn't it?" Alice asked, plopping down on a bench that had been cleared of snow.

"Tell me about it," I said shaking my head and sitting beside her.

"I'll never forget that time that you locked Jessica Stanley in a closet at the homecoming dance after she tried to convince you to let her ... you know... do dirty things to you in there." I laughed so hard it hurt, while Alice's exuberant laughter mixed with my own.

"I almost forgot about that." I shook my head still laughing.

"Yeah," She sighed, "That was the summer you got shipped off to boarding school. I really missed you the first six months of our senior year, you know?"

"Yeah," I said, looking down at the ground. When I was 17, I had been rather egotistical and cocky. I had been fairly mean and had gotten myself practically shipped off to boot camp. Luckily, Dad had changed his mind at the last minute and sent me to a boarding school that functioned similarly to that of a boot camp. Needless to say it straightened my ass out and I was able to come home seven months later after getting a good behavior report.

I looked at the ground and squinted at the snow, putting my hands in my pockets. I had to admit that as much as I had hated the girl that got me sent there at the time, I hated myself afterwards for what I'd done to her.

I sighed and shook my head, looking up when Alice all of a sudden shifted beside me to stand.

"Holy shit," she said. I stared at her wide eyed, shocked to hear Alice cuss, before following her gaze out to the parking lot.

Walking up to the school was a petite girl in jeans, with black boots and a black peacoat similar to my own. She had long flowing brown hair with loose curls that kept getting stirred up in the wind. The length of her long full lashes outlined her eyes lids as she gazed at the ground and her full pink lips moved lightly. She looked like she was mumbling to herself as she carefully tread across the ice in the parking lot.

Once she hit the snow there was a loud scream, "BELLA!" My head snapped in the direction of the blonde haired girl running towards her and I gaped. My mouth fell open and I just stared at the two of them in disbelief.

This girl, this petite little angel-like girl was Isabella Swan? The devil has a sick sense of humor considering the whole reason I got shipped off to boarding school was now practically standing right in front of me. What were the chances I'd run into her here nearly six years later?

I closed my mouth and just stared as she spoke to her younger sister, Alice clearly doing the same. She'd grown up... definitely, grown up. She wasn't the same almost non-existent-skinny 15 year old girl anymore that oozed goody-two-shoes and had never touched a boy. She looked different, clearly even more beautiful than she had been when we were younger, but something else was different and I couldn't put my finger on it.

After a moment, I looked away. Her sister was clearly upset about something; her voice laced with guilt as she argued something about Isabella leaving England to move back to America. Alice touched me lightly and I looked down at her.

"She looks beautiful, doesn't she?" She was almost stunned beyond words it seemed. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh, c'mon, Alice, who cares?"

"You know, Edward, if you would stop for a moment and look at who she really is, I have this feeling the two of you would get along really well."

"Right." I raised my eyebrows. "That girl nearly got me sent off to West Point and you want me to stop and smell her roses?" I shook my head in disbelief.

She rolled her eyes.

"What's up, kids?" Carlisle stepped in front of us and Alice and I both seemed to crane our necks to look around him at her. He turned around and I heard him gasp the minute his eyes landed on her.

She was looking at us now. Her eyes seemed to be filling with tears, and the three of us just stared back at her. I saw a flicker of panic come across her face as her eyes met mine and was tempted to look away, but before I could she motioned to her sister and turned back around to head in the direction she came, practically ice skating across the parking lot in her hurry to get away.

"Well," Dad said after a moment, "We should get going then." He furrowed his brow looking at me and my stomach dropped.

Alice took a hold of his arm, smiling at him as we all turned to walk towards the parking lot. I trudged a few feet back from them confused and trying to put together what had just happened. All I could really think was Isabella Swan, looking like an angel sent from heaven, had just graced Forks with her presence and something told me this wasn't just a week's visit.


	3. Fastidious Tidings

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta's Brooke and Donna (Girl Who Reads) for all their hard work on this story. Without you two, my story would be mediocre at best!

Enjoy!

* * *

Bella's POV

My first week in Forks was mainly filled with trying to wean my father and sister off ham sandwiches. I stocked the house with necessities, and searched online for a car that was suitable price-wise and driving-wise for the conditions in Washington.

For the time being, I used Jasmine's car, taking her to school and picking her up. Every afternoon she filled the car with stories of her day: catching me up to speed on the people at school, whom she was only starting to consider friends and *shocker* telling me about the guy she liked. I got the feeling she might not have spoken for three months straight considering the rate she was speaking and the amount of words that filled the car each afternoon.

My second day home, she'd continued right through dinner. Dad had sat at the table that evening with a smirk on his face followed by a look of concern as if he half expected my ears to fall off any second. I just glared at him, secretly daring him to comment. He didn't.

Dad and Jasmine both tried to talk to me about ballet, but I refused to talk about it. I knew they were afraid I'd resent them for my decision, but that just wasn't possible. There where various reason that I had, yet, to find words to elucidate my being in Forks.

For starters, I didn't really know how to explain while externally I seem like a well put together girl, internally there was raging battle. In fact, there were a number of raging battles. With everything Dad and Jasmine were going through right now, I didn't want to worry them with my own problems and I was afraid if I talked about ballet and my 'reasons' for coming home, something might slip out.

There was clearly another reason I refused to publicly or privately acknowledge why I'd made the decision I'd made to come home, but it was hard to ignore. That was, If I focused on Dad and Jasmine I didn't have to face my own issues. I was essentially hiding from myself - from my own demons.

On Friday, my week of seemingly good luck came to an utter halt and literately started walking backwards. I'd come home just in time for the town's winter Christmas party. It was also an honorary party for Dr. Carlisle Cullen. To me it wasn't only a huge red flag; there were also ten sets of railroad crossings down in front of it. I tried to convince my father I shouldn't go, but he wasn't having it.

Before I realized how feeble of an attempt my argument had been, I was sitting in the car staring at the town hall.

"C'mon Bells, you can't sit in a cold car all night," Dad said through the driver's side door before he closed it.

"I don't think I'd mind actually..." I mumbled while crawling out of the car. I heard Jasmine laugh and threw her a glance once I was standing.

"Bella, he probably won't even be here. He never comes to these events; he thinks most of these people are a waste of space," Jasmine said, putting her arm through mine and leading me across the parking lot.

"And you would know that how?"

"Alice... she's really nice. I've met her a couple of times since August." She shot me a smile, "You'll really like her and you're the same age, well, she's a little older, but still." My own sister's encouragement to become friends with the enemies' sister rang like betrayal in my ears.

"Maybe in an alternate universe," I spat and then momentarily wondered why I had never met Alice before.

Thinking back, I realized that perhaps I had, but that summer (the summer that is not spoken of) all those years ago had changed everything and I had tried vehemently to forget anything relating to Forks and Edward Cullen. I climbed the stairs slowly, dreading the moment I had to physically be in the same room as him. It was like being fifteen all over again or maybe it was just that I was acting fifteen all over again.

After I'd seen the Cullens at Forks High School the other day, I'd asked my father about them.

Dad said that they must just be home visiting for the weekend because all of the kids lived in Seattle now. I had mentally sighed in relief and vowed to keep my distance from any specific places where I might cross Edward's path during the weekends in case there was another surprise visit home.

As soon as Dad opened the front door to the town hall, the music and laughter from inside filtered out into the parking lot. I sighed and took a step through the door, immediately tensing up.

The party was... interesting, to say the least. I had forgotten how nosey people in such a small town could be. However, the moment I walked in the door I was reminded.

I should have realized the return of the new town's orthodontist's daughter might cause a stir, maybe I should have used that in my argument...

"Dad I don't want to take the light away from Dr. Cullen and people are going to be way too interested in me being here."

Riiiiight. I mentally face palmed myself for my stupidity. As if being a casualty for disaster in everyday life wasn't bad enough, now I was adding ignorant to the list.

Jasmine immediately went to find the snack bar. She and Dad had clearly been deprived of good home cooked food for the past few months. I had been worried my meals would be a little too healthy for their liking, so I'd been researching new recipes online to broaden my horizons - or in this case cooking knowledge. Being a dancer has it's advantages and disadvantages in the food department, or so I was learning.

I stood in the hallway after discarding my coat on the coat rack and decided, with black Chanel pants and a red silk top, I was way too over dressed. I actually contemplated putting my coat back on.

"You must be Isabelllllla," A little short lady said. breaking my train of thought. "I'm Mrs. Cope; it's so nice to finally meet you!" She grabbed my hand and shook it eagerly, apparently not patient enough for an extension.

"Bella, and thank you, you as well," I said with a confused smile. She clearly recognized my lack of knowledge, launching into a tell-tell story of her place in this tiny town. I just nodded and smiled in the necessary places before another red haired woman came along to introduce herself, interrupting Mrs. Cope's story and momentarily keeping me from dozing off.

Ten minutes later, I finally stepped out of the hall and into the actual party in an attempt to lose the redhead. Frankly, she wasn't much more interesting and she was rather annoying. Though had I of realized my actions were like being a piece of dead meat amongst vultures, I might have just dealt with her.

At least the crowd was standing between me and the lion himself sitting in the corner. I could not help observing the predator as I made my way over to my father.

Edward Cullen was sitting all god-like at a table beside a petite girl who I recognized to be Alice and he looked as if the party was a waste of his time. Jasmine had apparently been spot on. He was wearing a pair of gray dress slacks and a tucked-in white button down. I was momentarily thankful I wasn't the only dressed up person there until I realized who I was considering.

Edward was staring intently into his cup, as if he half expected the reflection to tell him he was the fairest in all the land (no, seriously, it wouldn't surprise me). I couldn't blame him for thinking that, though, with his disheveled bronze hair and perfect jawline made even more with one side of his collar popped up out of place. I shook my head and looked away.

The minutes ticked by achingly slow on the grandfather clock in the corner. I nodded in sync with Dad and Sue Clearwater, trying to get into their conversation when I felt someone staring at me.

I looked up to meet Cullen's eyes for the first time that evening. We stared at each other for several heart beats before he rolled his eyes and looked away. I felt myself stop breathing, as my body tensed up; I immediately turned around, trying to convince myself he'd left the room. After that I decided not to let my eyes wander again.

As the evening went on. I successfully avoided all Cullen contact. I also attempted not to trip or spill my drink all over anyone and kept my speaking to a minimum - opting instead to smile and nod as much as possible. I had no wish to be the topic of the town's gossip tomorrow and was hoping they were all getting their nosiness out of their system tonight.

Once an hour and a half had passed, I excused myself to the restroom and I was able to stow away out a side door of the building to rest my mind... and check my hand for any permanently damaging hand shakes I might have encountered at the party. My bones and fingers ached from the grasps of all of the enthusiastic people I'd met.

I sighed, took a cautious deep breath, and rested my head back against the wall. The air was cold, but it felt so good against my neck. I don't do well under this kind of pressure. Put me on a stage after only three hours of rehearsal to replace an injured dancer and I could pull it out my ass, making it look like a breeze without breaking a sweat. But me in a room full of prying eyes and I was constantly looking for an ostrich hole to bury my head.

I rubbed my arms in an attempt to brush off the goose bumps.

"You're going to get sick. You shouldn't be out here with so little clothes on." I heard someone say. I looked around, startled and slightly panicked, then I saw smoke rise from the edge of the stair railing.

I walked forward and peaked over. Edward Cullen was leaning against the cement staircase smoking a cigarette. I didn't respond; I didn't even breathe. I had no idea know what to say because that was actually a pretty decent comment coming from him. So instead I sat down on the top step by the rail, right above his head and put my head in my hands.

"Just arrived here and you're already falling apart. Are you ever going to grow up and get a back bone?" he huffed, blowing more smoke out.

"Now that sounds more like the Edward Cullen I know," I instinctively replied - in a condescending tone - before drawing in a single breath and holding it. He laughed dryly and I looked up.

"Wow, you finally learned how to talk back instead of just take it; I'm actually quite surprised." He blew out more smoke and the direction of the wind changed abruptly, blowing it straight in my face.

"Yeah, well, I guess it's more than I can say for you and your lack of compassion and likability," I huffed and shook my head looking out towards the parking lot, " As for needing to do some growing up, I think you should have that conversation in front of a mirror, Edward." I shocked myself with my words and the sudden courage to stand up to at least one of my demons.

Demons. Was Edward really one of my internal demons? One of the skeletons in my closet banging around to get out?

After a moment, I could practically hear his eyes rolling around in his head. I found myself almost begging for them to just go ahead and fall out.

"Get over yourself, Swan." Edward tossed his cigarette into the embankment and rounded the staircase to face me, "Just because you danced with the Royal Ballet, doesn't mean you're all worldly and knowing... and don't worry, there are some people that actually don't give a shit that you're here," he declared, walking past me up the stairs.

I just sat there stunned by his words as he opened the door; laughter from the party spilling out in waves.

" As for growing up... at least I didn't make you cry this time, don't give me incentive to try," he paused, looking back over his shoulder and raising his eyebrows as if he were daring me to comment before turning to walk through the door.

I ground my teeth together. What an ass. I pulled myself up off the cold cement, sucked in a huge breath of frigid air, and stomped down the stairs rounding the corner towards the car. I reasoned that sitting outside in a cold car was better than having to be within a 15 foot radius of Edward Cullen.

Who cared the immaturity that implied; I blame my mother.

* * *

**Please review! Thanks!**


	4. A Confute forfeit

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta Donna (Girl Who Reads) for her total awesomeness for putting up with my horrid writing skills. You are the best 3

**A/N:** Short chapter today, I'll try to make it up to you next week :D.

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**Edward's POV**

I stopped, once I was back inside the building, wondering if I should at least throw Isabella a bone and give her a jacket.

"Weak, Cullen," I huffed to myself, shaking my head.

That girl had showed up here unexpected and unannounced and, as far as I was concerned, it was all just to make my life a living hell. She'd been on my mind half of the past week as I wondered what the hell she was doing here. Then my father had spoken to Dr. Swan and learned that she was back indefinitely, at least for the time being. Which bothered me to no end for some reason.

I cursed under my breath at the thought that she'd already been able to get such a rise out of me. I had no other choice, but to be mean, though. She hated me anyways and it wasn't as if I was doing her any good by kissing her ass like everybody else.

I growled under my breath at the thought of her sitting on the steps outside. She'd pranced in here earlier this evening with her brown curls falling over the shoulder of her silk v-cut red blouse, showing off her perfect milky colored skin, and wearing a pair of black dress pants perfectly sculpted to her muscular bottom. All to flaunt herself in front of me as if I would care. She should have known better.

I sighed and shoved my cigarettes back into my coat pocket before hanging it up on the rack where all the others were. I couldn't believe after less than two hours in her presence I had resigned to smoking again. Dad wasn't going to be happy.

"There you are," came a voice from behind me. I turned to meet the top of Jessica Stanley's head and peered down at her smiling little round face. I wonder if girls like her ever learned. I wasn't the same asshole externally, well with one exception, but that didn't mean I wasn't the same asshole internally.

"What can I do for you, Jess?" I asked coolly, cocking an eyebrow almost unenthusiastically. I put a hand into one of my pockets and fiddled with my car key.

"Well... I was wondering what I had to do to convince you to have a drink with me later on?" She said, attempting a wicked smile. It looked more like one of Mr. Rogers puppets having a stroke with a creepy grin plastered across it's face.

"Look, Rainbow Brite," I paused for a moment, not knowing where that had come from, "I think we've moved on since high school, lets not revisit the closet."

One corner of my mouth turned upwards into a crooked smile, as she gasped. I took a step to the side, not waiting for her to answer, and walked past her heading in the direction of Emmett and Rosalie. I could feel her gape at me and after a moment I could sense the physical pain she was trying to inflict on my back with no such luck. I smirked. I could always count on getting a good rise out of Jessica Stanley when I needed one.

"What's up, brother?" Emmett said as I approached them. "What's with the smirk?" He looked over my shoulder, caught the direction of Jessica's glare, and chuckled.

"Are you ever going to learn?" He asked leaning in towards me shaking his head.

"I don't know if I want to," I exclaimed raising my eyebrows, smiling wildly.

"You're pathetic," Rosalie retorted.

"Good to see you, too, Rose," I acknowledged grabbing a glass and tilting it in her direction before taking a sip, "Would it be far off to venture a guess you're the reason my brother is fashionably late? As always?"

"Fuck off, Cullen," she spat in answer to my question. Emmett and I both laughed; Emmett cut off abruptly when Rose turned to glare at him.

We stood there for a few minutes people watching when Carlisle walked up.

"What are my two eldest kids over here laughing about?" Carlisle looked a little nervous, which wasn't something I was used to seeing from him.

"Don't worry Dad; we're behaving," Emmett chimed in.

"I find that hard to believe for some reason," Alice cocked an eyebrow at him, smiling as she and Jasper walked up.

"Good to see you two could make it, Emmett, Rosalie," Jasper said. Rosalie rolled her eyes and we all laughed. It was well known that if anyone invited the two of them anywhere, one had to lie and tell them to be there two hours earlier so they'd pull up around the time things were supposed to get started.

"Did you see Isabella Swan?" Alice leaned in towards Emmett, her voice laced with some sort of intrigue. I acted as if I hadn't seen her cut her eyes at me and look over towards the hors dourves.

I saw Emmett raise his eyebrows out of the corner of my eye and he seemed a little surprised. "She's here? I mean... she came?"

I rolled my eyes, "Really? This girl is a topic of conversation for us?" I didn't see the fascination. It was as if they were in on a secret I was completely oblivious to.

"I would have just figured she would run for the city limits when she found out you were inside of them," Emmett smirked pointing a finger at me on the word 'you'.

"Yeah, thanks, brother," I snorted, sipping my drink again and shaking my head.

"Let's be nice; that was a long time ago. I'm sure everyone's passed it now. Right, Edward?" Dad questioned, looking straight at me. Translation: I better be passed it.

"Yeah, sure," I said with a smirk.

Emmett just covered his face and shook his head, trying to hide his amusement while Alice punched me.

"Ouwhwww." I looked down at the little pixie, ready to step on her.

"You need to be nice. Bella is a grown woman now and you need to treat her with the same respect you treat the rest of us." She huffed. I didn't know why she was getting so emotional over the matter.

"Yeah, right, like that will ever happen. Edward will have to learn what respect is before he can learn how to use it," Rosalie growled.

My dad smirked, finding something funny before turning and walking away. I just stood there internally fuming, trying not to lose my cool.

I sighed, eventually, and started for the hallway again.

"Where are you going?" Alice called.

"Home. I'm calling it a night," I said, discussion closed. I slid into the hall and grabbed my coat before noticing that Bella's was still on the rack. I looked around, not having noticed her come back in the room, before yanking it off the hanger in irritation. I was not, yet again, going to be the reason that girl almost died of pneumonia.

I went out the side door to look for her, but all I found were heeled footprints leading out towards the parking lot. I rounded the corner and followed them until they disappeared on the asphalt. I took a few steps into the parking lot and looked around; she was nowhere in sight.

I turned to head back inside when something caught my eye from inside the white Toyota next to me. I walked up to the front passenger window to see Bella with the front seat reclined; she had pulled her knees up to her chest to minimize her shivering.

I sighed and without thinking I opened the door, briefly surprised it was unlocked, before draping her coat over her.

She gasped when I touched her and nearly sprung across the console into the driver's seat as she turned around to face me.

"Shit," I exclaimed. Jumping back, I pushed the door open even wider and almost fell backwards; she'd scared me nearly as bad as I'd scared her.

"What the fuck, Cullen?" She was wide eyed and had a look of panic on her face. She started inhaling and exhaling to calm herself. I just stared at her, watching her chest rise and fall in her red silk top, entranced beyond belief at the sight of it.

"I... um..." I shook my head and looked out into the parking lot to clear my mind, "You need to put a coat on. It's too cold to be sitting outside in that." I pointed at her top, looking at her again.

She gaped at me. "Right...," she reasoned after a moment, climbing back into her seat. "Well, um... thanks," She mutter while grabbing the coat and pulling it on.

She looked a little shocked that I'd even considered such an act of courtesy and, after a moment, she looked up at me as if she expected me to say something else. Something to counteract my gesture.

So I just nodded without speaking and walked away. Heading for my car and away from the girl that would inevitably be the end of me as the Edward Cullen I knew.

* * *

**A/N:** Seems to me Edward still has a_ little_ growing up to do - and possibly loose a little narcissim in the process. :) I know I know, You probably want more social interaction between the two, I promise you - that will come. I like to call this the slow burn... so bare with me. Don't forget to **Review** and let me know what you think thus far! xoxo


	5. Hell, Or Something Like It

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**A/N & Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta Donna (Girl Who Reads) for her total awesomeness for putting up with my horrid writing skills (that were apparently especially horrible this week... so not only do I fail for not getting a chapter up to you guys last saturday, but I apparently fail in general all the way around this week... So, my apologies :). Hope you enjoy the story at least!

**Also**, FFN must be doing some updates, because trying to post chapters has been a total pain. I've also noticed on one of my other stories I updated that it didn't save all my corrections in Edit/Preview. So if _thoughts _are not in italics I apologize. I tried to fix it, but it just isn't working (the story of my life this week, I swear). Now... into some frost bite we go...

* * *

**Bella's POV**

My alarm screeched and I literately jumped out of bed, catching my foot in my sheets, and tumbled to the floor taking with me the three books from the edge of the night stand. "Owwwwww"...

Christmas had past fairly uneventful, thank God. In all honesty, I think we had all tried to avoid it. However, there was no avoiding today... It was now the first day of school all over again.

For the past ten years, every class that started my day was ballet. Today, for the first time in that many years, my first class was chemistry. As if I didn't have enough reasons to hate science already, the 6:30 a.m. wake up call and the new bruise forming on my left knee wasn't helping.

"Oh... my... gosh Bella, what the _hell_? Are you okay?" Jasmine came stumbling through the door of my room. "You scared the crap out of me."

"You and me both." My dad, who was already dressed for the day, appeared beside her.

Jasmine came in and laid down on the floor beside me and looked at me. I stared back, all of a sudden college didn't sound so fun. I had yet to find a place to live in Seattle, so I had to settle for driving up for classes the first week. Eight hours of misery all of a sudden seemed like an awfully slow decent to hades... and my sister was reading my mind.

"I hope you're ready for your first day in Hell," Jasmine said with a smirk.

I couldn't say much to that, after all, she had one-up on me; I hadn't been to a normal school since I was 12. I highly doubted Seattle U was going to conform to all my dreams of what college was really supposed to be like, after spending so much time with friends at Oxford.

"Watch your mouth, Jasmine. I'll be downstairs waiting, when you're done getting ready Bella. You can drop me off at work before you go to school." he stated, already headed down the hallway. Jasmine groaned. She had clearly forgotten about her car being in the shop today to get tweaked, which meant she was driving dad's car. So, I had offered to drop him off at work if she'd pick him up.

I ended up finding an awesome deal on a black Acura MDX the week of Christmas and Dad surprised me by getting it for me as a coming home gift. I think he thought getting me a car insured I wasn't going anywhere for a while. And as much as realizing he thought I'd just leave him cold turkey hurt, I was thankful for the gesture as I was now a full fledged student with no income.

I looked at the ceiling and contemplated crawling back in bed. I mean, most mornings that start with me falling only get worse. Then again, I wasn't taking a partnering class today, so how bad could it be?

I regretted that almost the moment I thought it. Within the next hour I cut myself shaving, poked myself in the eye with my mascara wand, slipped - luckily - on the bottom step of the stairs, burnt myself on the coffee pot, and almost totaled the garage by driving forward instead of backwards.

"Maybe you should go back to sleep and start school tomorrow." Dad was still rambling on as I dropped him off for work."Your mind clearly doesn't agree well to certain life altering experiences. Good or bad."

I gave him a dirty look.

"Have a good day at work _dad_," I mumbled through my gritted teeth.

I was sure I saw a smile spread across his face as he turned to walk away. I'm glad everyone seemed to be doing much better already, at the expense of my health and embarrassment anyways. Hence the sarcasm.

Dad and Jasmine both seemed to take a turn for the better since I arrived in Forks before Christmas. It made me happy; it, also, made me feel responsible for making sure they stayed that way, even though I knew deep down it wasn't my place to do so. They were my family and I wanted the best for them. I wanted them to be happy... and if that meant me being close to them, I'd just have to figure some way to survive this for the time being.

By the time I made the four hour trek to school from Dad's Port Angeles office, the parking lot was full. It was, of course, overcast and freezing. I put my black pea coat on over my black cotton top and gray cardigan. Then I zipped up my gray leather boots and grabbed my matching scarf out of my book bag.

I paused momentarily when I opened the door, groaning at the sight of the ice on the pavement. _Not again._

I smiled when I reached the salted side walk. I had managed to make it through the parking lot without busting my ass from the second snowy-ice-packed adventure since my arrival in Washington. After the morning I'd had, it was quite an accomplishment.

_Kinda like a total Victory in a war against Genghis Khan, if that were at all possible._

I was so focused on my ridiculous thoughts and where I was putting my feet walking up the stairs, I barely noticed someone walking down them until I bumped into them. Two hands shot out and grabbed me as I started to fall backwards. I figured I had been pushing my luck making it all the way through the parking lot without so much as a slip... I was right...

"I'm so sorry," I said as I gained my balance and looked up. I was met by a strong green gaze against the pale skin of a Greek god;, his bronze hair tousled from the wind. It was Edward Cullen. I immediately shook off the weird feeling I got when he'd touched me that made me compare him to a Greek god. Embarrassment flashed across my face.

_Great... the cream on top of the pie - will someone go ahead and face palm me with it already?_

He looked as though I'd just broken some obvious rule; as if I were a menace. I thought he was going to yell at me when suddenly I got chills up my spin and wondered if he was possibly capable of doing much worse. Pushing me aside, Edward headed towards the parking lot. He had been mean to me before, but not like that.

I looked over my shoulder and watched him get into his car and spin out of the lot. I shook my head after a moment to clear my mind before heading into the building. If this school was small enough that I could run into him on the first day, this was bound to be the most miserable experience of my life.

_Genghis Khan had just sprung a surprise attack._

Finding my first class apparently required a Ph.D.; by the time I arrived, it was 20 past 12. One would have thought I'd just walked into a middle school classroom in a school of 300 students in bum-fuck-nowhere.

Everyone stared at me as if they'd never seen a girl before. After introducing myself to the teacher, and repeatedly apologizing for my tardiness, I took a seat at the back of the room hoping to avoid the stares. However, everyone still managed to go exorcist on me and look at me like I had a t-rex foot welded to my forehead.

My second class was a little less anxiety-ridden. I managed to be one of the first ones in and chose a seat near the back again. It was French, which I was fluent in (curse the need for unnecessary credits), so I wasn't extremely worried. Until the professor called on me as his first-day-scape-goat. Luckily, I survived and hopefully impressed him enough not to bother me the rest of the semester.

Unfortunately, the rest of the class has now called a hit-man out on me after Professor Virgo explained I'd just set the bar for the rest of the semester in this class, and it was particularly high. I conceded I probably wasn't going to make any friends in those unforgivably slow 60 minutes.

In between my French and English lit class, I went to the student lobby to check my email. It was rather full because I hadn't check it since I'd left England. I knew I would send a long winded email back to everyone about family issues and being in a small town in which you have to fight the forces of nature for a reliable internet connection.

Seemed logical to me. I, after all, was the one who had forced Dad to crawl on the roof and install a satellite for decent television 4 days days after I got to Washington (after he'd been thoroughly convinced I'd fall off and kill myself If I tried to put it up).

I was in the middle of sending my 4th reply when I noticed Alice Cullen and a blonde haired boy sitting in the corner laughing about something. I swear, that whole family is so beautiful. Unearthly so. It was almost heartbreaking to have to be in the same room with them. It boggled my mind seeing, as some of them were adopted (a story for another time). Honestly though, how does one adopt a kid knowing they will be so stunning? And where does one sign up?

Just then the door to the student lobby slammed and I looked up. Edward was standing beside the door and our eyes met briefly before I looked away. Instinctively, I shut my laptop and turned my back to him to put my planner in my black Burberry tote. I could feel his eyes on my back and it made me stiffen, but I forced myself to slide my laptop in it's sleeve and zip it shut peaking over my shoulder to witness him slowly turned to make his way over to the table where Alice and the boy were.

That's when I realized Alice was now standing across the table from me.

"Isabella?" I stared up at her.

"Um, yes, hi, Alice," I said hesitantly.

She had been very kind on both occasions I'd met her since being home. Once at the grocery store with Jasmine and the other at a coffee shop in Port Angeles. However, Edward was not at either of those encounters and I couldn't get over the tension in the air with his close proximity now. So I continued to gather my things.

"So you were able to get in this semester? That's wonderful. Have you found a place to stay in Seattle, yet?" She inquired. I cast a glance over her shoulder as I stood. Edward was staring at the back of her head as if he could make her neck snap without even touching it.

"Um, well... no," I answered hesitantly,"but I'm going to look at a few places this afternoon. I'm thinking about getting a place of my own. I haven't had a roommate in years." I shrugged trying to brush it off.

"Oh... well if you get in a bind in the time being, or don't feel like driving back every night, You're more than welcome to crash at our place?" It was a question. I just stared so she continued pointing over her shoulder, "We typically hang out here on Tuesdays and Thursdays. So just let me know." She smiled in encouragement.

"Oh... ok... well... um thanks for the gesture, I appreciate it Alice and I'll keep it in mind."

_... locked away in a draw to never come back out, no offense to you, only to your prick of a brother._

I returned her smile, "I have to go, I'm sorry."

She nodded as if she understood, but I still couldn't get to the door quick enough.

Once I was clear of the student building I began gasping for air, not having realized until then I hadn't been breathing the whole time. "Of all the places I could run into him," I mumbled, this campus was clearly not big enough.

I decided to sit in the courtyard in the freezing cold and suck in as much air as I could, because I came to the conclusion if I had many more encounters with Edward Cullen, I might go brain dead from lack of oxygen. Finally, after some self convincing, I forced myself to stand so I could hunt down my only life line and joy in this god forsaken school besides Art History: English.

And, oh, for the love of God, I spoke too soon... as I walked into lit class five minutes late, there sat Edward Cullen... beside the only empty chair in the classroom...

One word came to mind and rang in my ears through my sister's voice... "hell".

* * *

**A/N:** Sound's to me like Bellarina is going to have to get used to Jerkward, vice versa. I guess we'll find out if they can find some common ground eventually, Tee-hee-tee-hee.

**Don't forget to review :)**


	6. A Guilt Riddled Release

******Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**A/N & Giving thanks where thanks is Due: **Thank you to my beta Donna (Girl Who Reads) for her total awesomeness for putting up with my horrid writing skills (that were apparently especially horrible this week and last... )

Sorry for being a day late. I'm going to ask that you bear with me this month as it's a busy one. I'm also going to ask for you to bear with my story - it's a very slow burn to seeing Edward and Bella together. It's called Hot Flashes and Frost Bite for a reason... Granted, I know we've gotten quite a few Frost bites by now, but trust me - the hot flashes will come. :)

Also, yes, there is a back story and we will be getting to that in upcoming chapters as well. Just remember, appearances can be deceiving.

I do want to warn you, for those of you who do not like to see Edward with another woman then this chapter might be a little much to stomach. I would also like to warn that this chapter contains adult content.

Until next week :)

* * *

**Edward POV**

As if Forks wasn't bad enough, the forces of my own school were now working against me. I had been grateful not to run into Isabella during Christmas break while home, and had actually been relieved to get back to school come January. I knew she'd planned on attending spring term, but I didn't honestly think there was a chance in hell I'd bump into her here.

Low and behold, it was the first week of school and I'd already had two unfortunate run ins with her, not just in one week, in one day. I didn't know what was worse, having to look at her or physically bumping into her because every time our skin met I swear it did something to me and I was starting to think I was going crazy. She was fucking with my head all over again.

I thought I'd make it through the day, even after our run in in the student lounge which I practically thought Alice was going to ask her to up and move into my room and be our roommate or something. I didn't understand what her obsession was with befriending this girl. Hell, I didn't even understand my own reaction to her.

The last straw was when she walked into my lit class and sat beside me; the whole room seemed to close in. I was starting to wonder if maybe I'd broken a mirror at some point and just didn't remember.

I was the first one out the door when the bell rang and made a beeline for my car. I needed a release from the mounting tension I'd felt for the past 60 minutes. I flipped through my contacts and called Tanya. I wasn't one to hook up a lot of girls, but I had my select few whom I could trust to keep their mouth shut for such occasions. People thinking I was promiscuous and me actually being promiscuous were two totally different topics of conversation.

"Hi sexy," a voice purred through the phone.

"Are you busy?" I asked in a silky voice trying coax her. She knew exactly what I wanted; I only ever called her for one thing considering she was the only one I fucked anymore.

I could sense her smile. " I was just about to head to class."

"What would I have to do to convince you to skip it with me?"

"Depends, are you going to sign my doctors slip?" She joked.

I rolled my eyes, I wasn't in the mood for small talk. "We could work something out."

"The door will be unlocked." And with that I hung up the phone.

I'd found the best way to keep my temper at bay with Bella was to satisfy it with something else. The girl really didn't deserve me mentally beating her to a pulp and I was determined for some reason not to. It angered me that she was even crossing my mind: that I had to go to such extremes to keep my cool around her. I gripped the steering wheel tighter at the thought before letting out an irritated growl and stepping on the gas.

When I finally got to Tanya's house she was laying across her bed in a raunchy pair of see through boy cut shorts and a tank top. I smirked.

"You know, it's a little dangerous to leave your door unlocked walking around like that. What if you had unwelcome company?" She jumped at the sound of my voice.

I cocked an eyebrow as a crooked grin danced across my face.

"Hm, depended on what they looked like." She smiled and fluttered her eyelashes at me in an innocent way.

Those words being the exact reason I didn't fuck anyone without a condom.

She brushed her blonde hair out of her face. And in that moment I had to admit Tanya was hot. She was sexy and she was always full filling. My eyes drifted down her body across her breasts to the rim of her underwear before I peered down to her middle.

"Why don't we pretend _I'm_ the stranger?" I leaned over her bed and brushed my lips against her cheek.

She shuddered under my touch and I knew right then, that was all I had to do to make her do whatever I wanted. She smiled and pulled away to glance at my face before pulling my jacket off and unbuckling my pants.

I watched her; my eyes wandering over her body as she got up on her knees on the bed and unzipped my trousers before brushing her hands seductively against my sides as my pants slid down my legs.

I reached around her, cupping her ass in both hands before l lifted her up off the bed, pulling her legs around me, while simultaneously stepping out of my pants.

"The look in your eyes tells me you want something particularly dirty today, Cullen." she cocked an eyebrow at me.

I laughed dryly before pinning her against the door and grabbing her wrists, shoving them above her head. She gasped.

"You have no idea," I breathed into her neck.

She rubbed against me as I started kissing on her neck; her wetness evident through the thin layer of material that separated us. As she struggled against my hands trying to get me to release her arms, I tightened my grip. Tanya loved it when I held her down.

She continued to writher against me for a few minutes, moaning and throwing her head back before I sighed.

"Fuck," I said putting my head against her chest.

"You like it, Cullen?" She said breathily.

I didn't respond. I brought her hands down and grabbed her waist setting her back on the floor and turned to grab my pants.

"What? What is it?" She commanded. The shock was evident in her voice.

"Nothing ,Tanya. I just can't do this right now."

I was even shocked to hear the words come from my mouth, so I didn't dare look at her. I stepped back into my pants, pulling them up.

"That's not like you, Cullen." She huffed dryly after a moment.

"No kidding," I acknowledged, shaking my head as I zipped up my pants.

"Well you know, I could always ... just ... suck your dick."

I turned around, she'd grabbed my attention with those last three words.

"You clearly need to get rid of some of this tension," she added, massaging my shoulders.

I watched her closely as she slipped two fingers in her mouth sucking on them before pulling them back out and running them down my naval before reaching in my pants and tracing the base of my manhood.

I gasped. My body finally getting a rise out of something. It started to swell as she massaged it with her hand and I focused on her lips getting even more wet as she licked them.

"o...okay," I gasped again after a moment.

She got a victorious grin on her face and grabbed my shoulders sitting me on the edge of her bed. I leaned back onto my hands, closing my eyes.

"Relax," she whispered in my ear brushing her lips against my cheek while undoing my pants again with her hands.

Before I knew it, she had me all the way in her mouth and I gasped, again, unintentionally. I'd never known Tanya to deep throat before. Which made me wonder with whom and how long she'd been doing it to finally get it.

In this moment, I didn't care she was breaking our rules of engagement, though, because my head was totally somewhere else than in that this room with that this girl.

I felt her taking me in and out of her mouth, adding her hand to the rhythm and massaging my balls with the opposing one.

I moaned loudly as I closed my eyes. "Fuck," I breathed.

I heard her chuckle in victory against my dick; the vibrations sending me even closer to the edge.

She sped up her movement, adding her second hand to my length, moving it in the opposite direction and, occasionally, plunging my head to the back of her throat and down it.

"Holy shit! I'm going to cum," I blurted out.

Yanking at the comforter on the bed and balling my hands into fist, I collapsed backwards on the bed and bucked my hips right before I felt my release shoot down the back of her throat.

I gasped and she swallowed, my body relaxing after a moment.

"Fuck."

She laughed lightly. "Edward Cullen, you are something else."

I peered down my body at her sitting on her knees in front of me. She shook her head and smiled victoriously.

Finally, I moved to zip up my pants and she stood up.

"I was thinking about pulling out my dildo. I thought you might like to watch?" She said in the lustiest voice she could manage. For the first time ever, it sounded like a pathetic plea for attention.

"No can do, Tanya. I've got to get back to campus." I stood, not even looking at her.

I did see her brow furrow out of the corner of my eye in confusion; so I turned away from her to grabbed my coat, "Oh... and thanks."

I walked out of her bedroom and exited the front door without another word.

I'd deal with the aftermath of that later. Right now, I had to get away from anyone and everyone. I had immediately felt guilty for some unknown reason over what had just happened and I didn't understand it.

"Christ, can't a guy nut?" I wondered once in the confines of my car.

I started my car and pulled out of the driveway, turning on Debussy to calm my nerves.

Halfway back to school, my phone started ringing. I looked at the caller id and sighed before picking up.

"Yes, Alice, I'm sorry. I'm on my way back to the school now." Snapping it shut without waiting for a response.

When I pulled up, Alice and Jasper were standing on the curb under an umbrella. Alice was tapping her foot impatiently and glaring at my windshield. I mockingly wondered what it had done to her.

"What is your problem, Edward?" Alice asked, getting into the car in a huff with Jasper.

Jasper only nodded in my direction and sighed.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Alice, but I assure you whatever it is I'll make it up to you." I turned to her, smiling my biggest, most gracious, smile.

"Oh, is that the game we're playing now? Ok, then..." she said with smirk. "We're going out next Thursday."

"Is that supposed to be a _punishment_?" I grinned, cocking an eyebrow at her.

"You just wait, Edward Cullen," she threatened; leaning back into Jasper's arm as I spun out of the parking lot towards the apartment.

_Gladly._

* * *

**A/N:** *dead bolts the steal door* I know... I know... you hate me right now. I'm sorry. However, perhaps if you _**Review**_ and tell me how much you want to see Edward and Bella work out their differences, I'll see what I can conjure up in coming chapters to try to appease you :)


	7. Thwarting Word Vomit

**Disclaimer:** All things Twilight belong to Stephanie Meyer, no copyright infringement is intended. The contents of this story is the due to the creativity and imagination of TheGirlNtheYellowShoes.

**A/N:** OKAY... so, I would like to apologize for this chapter being late and I ask that you please please please bare with me. RL has sort of taken over all of my extra time this month and will continue to do so through part of next month as I have a number of RL projects going on right now. I will continue to write this story - I am just going to plan to update every two weeks for the time being (give or take a few days) instead of every week. Come mid june, I will have more spare time to possibly update more often again.

With that said, I'd also like to tell you how hard this chapter was to write. Namely because I wasn't quite ready to spill the beans yet (you'll know what beans I'm talking about after you read below), but seeing as a few people clearly needed a little back story - I felt my hand was forced a little on the matter.

I'd like to thank Girl who Reads for all her hard work on my last two chapters. Without her, you guys wouldn't have had either of them because they were such a tragic mess. So big round of a plause to her! Thank you, thank you, thank you! (and you can all personally thank her on twitter girl_who_reads by following her. She does a lot of really cool stuff with The Writer's Coffee Shop)

Speaking of: I have now posted my story on TWCS. If you'd like to find me on there, I have also posted a banner for this story. I will also post a direct link to the banner on my profile, check it out!

Okay, enough yapping - ENJOY!

* * *

**Bella's POV**

After trying for the life of me to get my English class changed, I had to settle for defeat. I was stuck for 60 minutes_ every_ Tuesday and Thursday for the next_ 16_ weeks in the same room as Edward Cullen. I wanted to kill myself at the thought of this, but then I realized that meant he was also stuck with me and all of a sudden my resolve was simple.

I figured he most likely didn't need the class considering he was actually Med student. So either he was simply taking the class because he, too, enjoyed literature - or perhaps it was just that he couldn't find a basket weaving class that was up to his standard, not that med students needed those.

I deliberated my plan of attack and with a fantastic pep talk on my sister's part, I decided to confront the issue head on with him the first chance possible.

"Look, I know you don't like me. I sure as hell don't like you, but I can't get into another English class so we're both going to have to come to some sort of compromise." I asserted, Dropping a book dileberately onto the table beside Cullen in the library Thursday before class.

"Then drop the class," he growled, standing up and snapping shut a thick text book.

"No, I can't. You drop the class," I stated firmly, looking him straight in the eyes. Thank you sudden-_lack_-of-constant-defeat attitude!

He glared at me and leaned in to hover over me as if he expected me to cower like a dog. I stood my ground.

"Over my dead body," he enunciated slowly.

"We can arrange that," I replied snidely with a smirk as I crossed my arms. I was getting some sort of irrational high out of the situation. I think the right and left side of my brain were physically slapping each other like the angel versus devil in conflict.

"Over _your own_ dead body!" He exclaimed.

"Why does everything have to be so hard with you?" I huffed, exasperated.

"Is this some sort of karma? Payback? What? Getting me shipped off to boarding school wasn't enough for you?" He spit back, incredulously.

"Don't you DARE..."

"Excuse me..." a small voice tried to cut into our rapid volley of words.

"What? 'Don't I dare' _what_? Make this about you? No, you've already done that." He shrugged sarcastically.

"EXCUSE me..." Edward and I turned to look across the table. A librarian was standing there with her arms crossed and and irritated look on her face. "I'm going to have to ask that you two quiet down or _leave_."

"Sorry," we said in unison, which immediately brought our attention back to each other.

"This has nothing to do with the past, Edward. It has everything to do with situations of the present." I looked at him and held up my hands, praying for a bone.

"Oh really? Because it sounds to me a lot like you're trying to purposely make my life a living hell."

Anger seeped from my pours as I heard the woman across the table sigh. I couldn't be bothered with her distress, though, because now I was pissed and all of a sudden the words started to spill out like word vomit...

"You left _me_ in the woods remember? 7 minutes in heaven and you left a 14 year old foolish klutz in the woods. What? Did you think I'd follow your scent back to the camp like a dog? Yeah, well, I clearly tried and look where it got me... 10 feet in the ground in the pouring rain! You want hell? _That_ is hell."

If there had been any sort of rustling about in the library, it was now gone. A pin could have dropped; and, it would have so loud people would have ducked for cover (if they weren't already seeking shelter from the steam pouring out of my ears). I could feel eyes on us from every direction, but the only ones that mattered were staring back at me with a horde of emotion pouring out of them.

"I thought you were 15?" Now someone else was clearly praying for a bone.

"No. Ugh, what?" Now I was confused. "How is that relevant to this conversation? I was 14, it was a few weeks before my birthday."

I pulled at my hair. This guy was going to drive me insane; there was no way around it. I'd survived a _lot_ in my short life, but it was becoming clear: Edward Cullen would inevitably be the end of me.

Edward sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"Cullen, you're making this more complicated than it has to be." I shook my head and rolled my eyes, "Don't be immature, just leave me alone and I'll leave you alone. Okay?"

"What is your problem? You show up here thinking you're some Princess, thinking everyone should bend to your beck and call; as if all of a sudden things should be run the way you expect them to be run. And then you turn it around to act as if you're taking the high road. You are nothing but a constant thorn in my side," he said pointing a finger in my face.

I flinched back away from it. He was so accusatory, as always.

"I don't know _what_ you are talking about, _you barely know me_ so stop acting like you know anything about who I am or what you believe I think about myself." My voice steadily rising.

Someone behind me cleared their throat at our disruption as we continued to glare at each other. The librarian was still standing across the table from us; so, I had a feeling it was either someone who didn't care for our drama or someone higher up the food chain. Edward started to say something with his accusing finger still in my face.

I swatted at it and he looked at me surprised. "As for being a _thorn_ in your side, I'll take that as a compliment considering how symbolic roses are to Aphrodite- but all symbolism aside, one thing remains true no matter what the color. They will almost _always_ draw blood when thoughtlessly cared for. I'm not dropping the class, so you're just going to have to grow some balls and deal with it, Edward."

I spun on my heel and walked away, not giving him a chance to say anything... Victory shined on my face like a spartan king in a post-war winning glow. I just hoped I wasn't Leonidas and his 300 or I was doomed.

However, when Edward didn't show up for class I was secretly air guitaring my spartan shield.

* * *

"Hi, Isabella, isn't it?"

I looked up from my seat as the final bell rang in Lit and was met by a tall, broad shouldered man with blonde hair. He looked intimidating and slightly dangerous.

"I'm James; it's nice to meet you." He held out his hand. I stared at it for a moment until he dipped his head down trying to make eye contact with me again.

I shook my head and took his hand, "I am so sorry... Hi, nice to meet you." I gathered my books and stood.

"So what do you think about Professor Cheney's class so far?" He asked as we started walking towards the door. I couldn't pin point it, but he kinda creeped me out.

"Um, yeah, it's great," I said, forcing a small smile. His broadening smile made me wonder if I'd overreacted. "English is my favorite class, though, so I could just be bias," I sighed.

He laughed, "I doubt that, Benjamin is a well known professor. He's very well respected, so if you're bias, then the rest of us are, too." He winked, "So, what are you up to right now? I was just about to go work on our lit paper, would you be interested in..."

I still couldn't push the thought aside: my creeper alert was on full force.

"Well...," I cut him off, looking at my watch to make like I was late for something, "it was nice to meet you, James. I've really got to get going. Sorry," I said, "Catch you next week?" I tried to be polite regardless, but having learned my lesson for being too polite to strangers before, I mentally kicked myself.

"Definitely." He smiled. "Have a good afternoon, Isabella Swan." I didn't wait to correct him on my name, deciding against him needing to know I preferred Bella.

I may have been overreacting, but I couldn't wait to get out from under his eerie gaze. It reminded me of a past experience, embedded in my memory I'd desperately tried to leave behind in London. I turned and walked away quickly. Practically running to the south building once I hit the courtyard and pushing by Edward on the crowded steps by the parking lot in my haste to get into my car and lock the doors.

I sat there staring out the front windshield trying to calm myself out of a near panic attack when I heard a tap on my window. I jumped and nearly dove over the console into the passenger seat before I looked up to meet eyes with Edward. He held his hands up in a gesture of peace, realizing he'd just scared me.

I rolled down the window hearing mumbled curse words. "What is it Edward?" I tried to steady my voice, using little emotion.

"Are you okay?" He looked entirely confused, but a hint of concern showed in his piercing green eyes.

I stared at him: this was the last scenario I'd ever expected from him after the scene in the library today. I nodded, after a moment, as I saw irritation cross his face.

"I'm fine... I've got to go. I'm sorry," I said looking away as I rolled my window up and put the car in reverse. I heard him call after me, but I didn't look back. I didn't want to have to answer to him asking me why I probably looked like I'd just seen a ghost. So instead, I did what I did best with Edward... get out of dodge before things went astray.

That evening, post coffee with a fellow classmate, I had a meeting with my realtor, Donna, about an apartment. I wasn't looking for anything big; I planned on going home as much as possible - considering the whole reason for being in Washington was to be with Jasmine and Dad.

I met Donna at Cosmopolitan Apartments on University Way, 3.5 miles from the school. They had a reasonable studio apartment for 750 square ft. I was sold on it immediately, between the wood floors, okay closet, reasonable sized kitchenette and the newly remodeled tile bathroom. So I said yes. After convincing her I couldn't do it any other day, I arranged for her to meet me on Sunday afternoon to sign and finalize documents and exchange payment for a key.

I knew Dad would pay the rent, meaning I wouldn't have to pull out of my savings. Now that I was no longer working for the time-being, I'd become a little more reserved with my spending. Funny enough, it made me realized how much I really did shop when Istarted receiving cards from Nieman and Burberry telling how they missed me this month and couldn't wait for my return visit.

Sunday morning, Dad, Jasmine and I all took a trip to Seattle to find some furnishings for my new place. I settled on an rustic looking steal, antique, two seat patio set for the kitchenette area, then I found an off-white antique twin bed and matching side table for the opposing wall. At Target, I was able to find a lavender comforter and stumbled (literately) upon two cloth animal print chairs to sit at the end of the bed in the empty area over a fluffy white throw rug I already had.

When we got back to my apartment, Dad and Jasmine helped me unpack the car.

"So, you never did tell me," Jasmine started, setting down one of the chairs.

"Tell you what?" I asked, putting away kitchen utensils.

"What Edward said about the whole getting along for the sake of literature," she laughed.

I realized it must seem completely ridiculous to a 17 year old, or anyone else for that matter. I love English, though, and I'd already given up so much that there were certain things I wasn't willing to part with. I couldn't tell that to my sister, though, whom was one of the persons I'd given it all up for.

"You seem to enjoy my obvious disdain for a certain Cullen," I huffed.

"Bella, yes, he's a jerk - a really hot jerk might I add - but you two most definitely need to work past a few things."

Why do I feel like I'm constantly repeating myself lately? I could feel it rising in me again... the word vomit...

"He _left_ me in the woods during 7 minutes in heaven... which promptly turned into 7 hours of hell! I don't get what part of that you people don't understand!"

"Actually I think it was more like 9..."

"Whatever, I'm not discussing this. _'working past a few things'_ is out of the question..."

Twice in four days was more than enough digging up the past. My past was like a grave marked "contaminated": a 6 foot deep stewing incurable disease. If I allowed people to start digging in Pandora's box now, there was no telling what else might make its way out. Like a new mutation of the same disease or in laymen's terms ... another secret I wasn't yet ready to expose.

I didn't like to ponder over my misadventure in the woods while camping my last summer I'd ever spend in Forks. First, because I'd have to admit to myself I had actually been excited Edward had chosen me as his 7 minute girl only to ditch me on purpose as a joke, which shouldn't have surprised me so much. He'd always played jokes like that, but I'm quite sure he hadn't intended on me getting lost. However, when the adults finally found me in the bottom of an old abandoned well I'd fallen down, I'd cried wolf like no other getting him in serious trouble. Which brought me to my second admission: I'd tattled because I was hurt... and I was hurt because I had always secretly had a crush on Edward Cullen...

"I don't quite get you two. He seems so well put together every time I see him. Nothings ever out of place - except for the sex-hair - and with his chosen field he has to be mature to some extent."

I couldn't decide if she was still talking to me or simply rambling to herself, but I momentarily wondered what my 17 year old sister knew about sex-hair. I was debating the bees and the trees - or the birds and the bees - or whatever that talk is about boys and sex that parents have with their children. I most definitely didn't trust my mother's input on that conversation.

"Edward might be mature for his age in certain areas, Jasmine, which most likely include his career choice and his family rather than his extra curricular activities." I cocked an eyebrow at her. She blushed, realizing I had filed away the sex-hair comment for later.

"However, when ever it came down to him and me, he's always been as immature as a five year old who thinks girls have cooties and one might die from cooty contact."

Jasmine rolled her eyes and I smiled. It was rather amusing to think about, I guess.

"So? For the sake of literature?"

I sighed as my moment of internal amusement came to an abrupt end. "He of course was a hot head with me, but I told him how it was and didn't give him a chance for rebuttal." I smiled in triumph.

Jasmine stood and turn to me shocked, "You told Edward Cullen to shove it?"

She laughed.

"Wow, sis... you definitely didn't get that from Dad," she whispered.

I glared at her.

"Jasmine," I huffed.

"Sorry," she said, going back to work.

Dad walked in and set down a few more boxes. "I'm going to walk up the street and grab us all some coffee. How does that sound?"

I cocked an eyebrow at him, "Um... okay."

"I just want to make sure the area is safe, Bells," he chimed in.

I was thankful for my father's overprotective tendencies. Seeing as I'd already checked the area myself, though, I knew he'd be pleased with what he found and so I brushed it off lightly.

"Alright, we'll be right here," I said with a hint of sarcasm. Jasmine chuckled and Dad shook his head with a sly smile on his face before heading out the door again.

A moment later Jasmine sighed and I turned around to look at her. She was standing at the end of the box with the bed in it staring at me.

"Do you think she's ever going to talk about it with us? Or talk to us _at all_ ever again?" I was shocked when she mentioned mom. We'd avoided the topic ever since I had arrived home.

"I don't know, Jasmine," I said leaning against the counter and crossing my arms. "Mom's always stepped to the beat of her own drum. She's flaky; she's almost mentally unstable. Who knows," I sighed. It was disappointing to have to say I didn't know if my sister would ever get to ask our mom the questions she wanted to ask, whatever they were.

I'd come to terms years ago with my mother and who she was. I had resorted to becoming my own parent at a young age because of the situations I'd been in with ballet. I had no choice but to get myself up and cook myself meals and get myself to class - I had to be responsible in order to survive and thrive in the small world I had desperately wanted to be a part of.

"I think," I said after a moment, "given some time, maybe she'll contact us. Maybe she'll at least say sorry, but I don't know if you or Dad are ever going to get the answers to whatever questions you may have though. That's not mom."

She shook her head and looked at the ground, tapping her foot. After a moment her head shifted back up to meet my face, "What about you? How are you so cool about all of this?" I knew it was coming; my sister didn't understand that the distance I'd had from our family would make a difference in my relationships with them. She was still young and naive.

"Jas, I've been gone for a long time, and... I think, maybe, I feel my mom's been gone for an even longer time than me." I paused. "In a sense, I've had more time to come to terms with how she is than the two of you because the day I moved to Russia, she stopped being my mother." I turned back around to put more things in the cupboard.

"That must have been scary..." she said after a moment. I didn't dare look at her; I could hear the tears in her voice. "Being a little girl in a foreign country and having to do everything on your own. Not having a mother."

I just nodded. "Yeah, but I always had you and I always had Dad, so that made it worth it. I wanted to make you happy and give you someone that you _could look up to_ and I wanted to make my dad proud. I've always stepped to the beat of my own drum, too, I guess, but it was just a different direction from mom's." She nodded in agreement, facing away from me. I knew her tears had betrayed her and she didn't want me to know. I sighed after a moment and walked into the bathroom to put the new towels away.

We worked in silence after that.

Dad had returned with our coffees, convinced the area was okay, and helped put the rest of my furniture together. Once we had my bed put together, Dad disappeared, again, only to return with a medium size wrapped box that he put on the floor in front of me. Jasmine hoped on the bed beside me on her knees and looked at it as if she was waiting for Justin Timberlake, himself, to pop out of it like a jack in the box.

I looked at Dad accusingly and back at the birthday print wrapping paper. After a moment of enjoyment over my sisters near hernia, I ripped the paper off. It was a small flat screen tv that was perfect to mount to the wall area between the kitchen and the hall leading to the bathroom and door.

"Jasmine and I missed your birthday last fall. It was on sale, including extra speakers, so we decided to get it for you."

"Dad..."

"Nope, don't want to hear it..." He shook his head and held up his hand. "Happy belated birthday, Bells." He smiled and, seeing his excitement, I couldn't argue.

I returned the smile and sighed, "Thank you." I got up to give him a hug and Jasmine came over to join us.

They stayed to have my first meal with me in my new apartment before heading back to Forks that night. I was sad to have to part with them when they left. It felt weird. Being in a strange apartment, in a strange city alone and not being there to dance.

I kept myself busy by unpacking. I was thankful my coffee press had made it back from England in one piece. It takes up much less space than a coffee maker: leaving room for a blender and strawberry smoothies were my favorite morning snack. I set up my iHome on the side table and plugged in my iPod, turning up the music to distract my mind while I fiddle with my clothes and wooden hangers. Before I knew it, it was midnight and by the time I was done showering and getting ready for bed it was 1 am. I started to get into bed when I realized I had a bare nail sticking out of the wall above my bed.. It must have been overlooked from the last tenant.

I hopped up and went over to the open crates by the door to pull out a large canvas copy of one of my favorite paintings. I placed it up on the wall and took a step back to make sure it was straight before hoping into bed and hesitantly turning off my side lamp.

I rolled over with high hopes of dreaming of San Giorgio Maggiore at Twilight as it hung above my head...

So you can imagine my dismay at dreaming of a certain Cullen instead...

* * *

**A/N: **Sooooo? What did you think? Don't forget to **Review** and tell me how you feel...

**Also:** If you have twitter - please add TwilightAwards to your followers, They post updates on fanfics as they happen.

You can also follow me grlnyellowshoes.


End file.
